Guns and Goals
|The Gun Show|
My recent workover:
• Deadlift 5x100lbs, 3x115lbs, 1x130lbs
• 5 rounds of:
- 200 meter row (this was at sprint pace)
- 10 deadlifts with 95lbs
• 100 mountain climbers
• 1 minute hollow rocks
Granted I was breathing hard and had to rest a few times so that I could catch my breath and keep my form from going to crap during the deadlifts, this was not a seriously challenging workover for me. Over a year ago, on the other hand, I would have either:
A) forgot to add in the weight of the bar on those deadlifts and completely failed trying to lift 140 pounds for for the first rep of the first round (without warming up)...
B) passed out on number 50 of the mountain climbers and (if I woke up and tried to finish)...
C) cramped up like an ab stabbing mother fucker on the hollow rocks.
I've been reviewing my past workovers and have suddenly realized I've come a long way. I've been consistently training for almost two years now. I'm not your go-to-the-gym-for-two-months-then-go-back-to-eating-twinkies kinda girl. When I have a goal I stick with it. Unless I get bored.
|Post 200 Mountain Climbers|
OK. I know I've said this before, but I think I've got solid confirmation now that I really am a masochist.
I've heard that's good for ultra running. Looks like I'm in the right sport. *grin*
While my goals have been about taking my running to the next level, I've been pleasantly surprised with the bonus physical results as well. Funny that it never occurred to me that there would be a physical "bonus" to my training. OK. I did think my body would change. Like I'd lose my boobs. Ok. I won't lie. I never had boobs to begin with, but whatever fat was on them eight months ago is nowhere to be found now. But most of that fat has been replaced by muscle. Which I'm OK with. At this point I am embracing anything that adds to my boobies, short of silicone. And now I'm seeing definition in my abs, shoulders and back as well. I look strong. Almost like I could beat a sumo wrestler to the ground strong. OK. Maybe not THAT strong, but man! What a transformation! And I have no idea what my booty looks like, but my husband will confirm its firm-ness. So there you go.
But physical benefits aside and even more importantly, I am changing inside my head too. I am transforming my confidence. I had no idea I was lacking so much until the first few months of my training. I joked with my friend that we needed to swap heads. I had the dedication and consistency she needed and she had the confidence I needed. If we could borrow a little from each other we'd be unbreakable.
I hated going into the gym in the beginning. It was very intimidating and many times discouraging. But my consistency and dedication won out and as I kept going in and trying new things I slowly built up confidence in what I was doing. Even if I totally fucked up and did it wrong, I'd try again the next time. And the next time.
Which is why I have a permanent welt on the back of my head from jumping rope.
Hey. I never said I got it right.
I know the mental stuff is still a work-in-progress, but wow. I really have come a long way even with that. I need to give myself more credit sometimes.
So at the risk of sounding like I'm bragging, I'm proud of myself. I've worked hard non-stop for almost two years. Not to be skinny. Not to be pretty. Not to be fit. But to run. That's all.
My coach has often emphasized the importance of having goals beyond just looking pretty or losing weight. I understand now what he means. Real dedication is not driven by superficial ends. Real dedication is driven by a passion. Its your obsession. Your escape. Your sanctuary. Barefoot running reignited my passion for the trails again. Now I want to be strong, kick ass, and be confident enough to run any distance. Or at least try without second guessing myself.
Its funny how when you dedicate yourself to a goal magic just happens.
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